The Content Monster

Silence is not golden. I hate silence.

I used to hate silence because it made me feel uncomfortable. I didn't like my thoughts when left alone with them, and they didn't like me either. I couldn't handle the introspection that inevitably accompanied silence, so I had to keep some kind of noise going to keep my mind occupied. (Pro-Tip, if this describes you, then it is definitely time for a look "under the hood," in spite how uncomfortable it may be.)

Now I hate silence because if feels like wasted time. I like to feed my mind things that I feel will help me grow as a person. I love podcasts. And blogs. And Twitter. I follow some amazing people, and I love the perspectives they bring, and the questions they ask. I love books too, but I don't feel I have time enough to read a long blog post, let alone an entire book. I literally have 42 books on my "To Read" list, and a few more that I own but haven't gotten around to reading.

In my quest for content, I'm always in a rush. I skim the blogs I follow, looking for nuggets of wisdom I can glean. I do the same with my twitter feed. I skip over the intro on podcasts. I want to get to the "good stuff" as fast as I can, so I can absorb it, and then move on to the next source. I've found so many terrific sources of "good stuff" that I have a hard time keeping up. And maybe it's a bit OCD of me, but I often feel obligated to keep up; that if I don't, I might miss some vital insight.

This pattern has resulted in a nearly constant stream of input going into my brain, with little or no time to analyze or mull over the concepts I am hearing. Its as if I'm drinking from a firehose, and have no time to swallow. I've not been allowing my brain any down time.

I realized however, that this is not only unwise, but it is fundamentally faithless. While there is nothing wrong with pursuing wisdom and understanding (in fact the Bible commends those pursuits), I don't need to be worried about rushing to consume all the wisdom and insight I can get my hands on, so I don't miss any "vital insight." If something is "vital" then I can count on God (who promises He will supply all of my needs) to make sure I have it when I need it. Yet, while I know His timing is always perfect, I still struggle with this.

Additionally, if there is no break in the "input", no mental down time, no .... silence.... then I am leaving no space in which to think about what I'm hearing, and make sure it is truth.

Lastly, with no silence, I'm leaving no room for God to speak; no opportunity for me to hear the Lord's "still, small voice" leading me, guiding me.

I love my phone because it brings all of this content, all of this information to me in one convenient portable little package. But I'm learning that, periodically, I need to simply turn off this little Content Monster, and be still before the Lord. I need to give Him a chance to speak, and then do the hardest thing of all... listen. 

I may hate doing it, and it takes time, but soon His voice does come, amid the sounds of silence.

Question:
Do you keep yourself constantly busy? What keeps you from setting aside time to think, and "be still" before the Lord?