waiting...
wandering...
wondering what I did (or am doing) wrong that has caused God to abandon me to this barren, trackless wasteland...
... Forgotten.
For years I've held the tacit view that the 40 years of wandering in the wilderness by the nation of Israel was God's punishment for their lack of faith to enter the Promised Land. It never ceases to amaze me how your understanding of an event you have known about for years, can suddenly and drastically shift upon the sudden realization of a new perspective which you have not thought of before, a new question that has never before been asked:
The wandering; was it punishment? Or instead, was it discipline?
If you had asked me when I was a child, I would have said "They're the same thing!" But they're NOT! There is a difference! To punish is "to subject to pain, loss, confinement, death, etc., as a penalty for some offense, transgression, or fault." Discipline is "to punish or penalize in order to train and control; correct;chastise." Succinctly; punishment is pain, discipline is pain with purpose; aka training.
God was not just lashing out at Israel, venting his frustration, anger, and/or disappointment. God was training them; He had purpose in their pain. In Deuteronomy 8 God explains that their wandering was intended to teach them:
Humility - it would not be by their own strength, but by God's power that they would conquer; Like when God destroyed the Egyptian army, or when His power enabled them to defeat the Amalekites as long as Moses held the staff of God over his head.
Spirituality - man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord. They must learn to obey God.
Faith - God will provide. While wandering in the desert for 40 years, God provided bread, meat, water, and even their clothes didn't wear out.God was teaching them critically important lessons which they would need as they entered the Promised Land. He was preparing the nation to succeed where they had previously failed!
This is not a story of God's anger, wrath, and punishment, but instead is a display of God's love, in-action, for his people; He keeps His promises, He meets their needs, He forgives their failings, He guides, trains and teaches them to overcome those failings and then leads them into His promised rest.
Suddenly my "wandering" seems less pointless, and my time less "wasted."
I have things to learn; Class is in session!
Out curiosity, what would "moving forward" look like? Is that defined in your mind, or are you just sick of where your at? Because those are really different things.
ReplyDeleteOooh! I like that. I especially like the differentiation between punishment and discipline - that's a critical difference I didn't cognicize before! ... and apparently I'm throwing around the BIG WORDS today, big words. Oh yeah. B)
ReplyDeleteThat waiting pattern, I know, I hear ya! But you're right. God never wastes a moment of our lives, a moment of our joy, a moment of our pain. His plan is over all. And I hear it's GOOD. ^_^ *huggle*
@Sarah; Great question/observation! And I agree! It is one thing to be frustrated with, and impotently complain about your current circumstances; It is another thing entirely to be dissatisfied and then take steps to resolve it!
ReplyDeleteThere are several different areas of my life in which I would like to see "forward" movement. What "forward" means is defined to varying degrees of clarity from one to the next, but I do have a general direction for them all. I also have some action plans (again, some more clear than others) but have not seen much progress. Thus, the "stuck" feeling.
@Istra: I know it won't be wasted. Experience has repeatedly reinforced that fact! I'm just impatient! =)