But I want it!

We've all seen it; the child running rough shod through the store, with no regard for the other people around. Like a little tornado, leaving behind a path of destruction, and a poor mother desperately trying to catch up. You hear a wailing voice rising from the next aisle over "But I WANT it!" You round the corner just in time to see the child collapse on the floor in a full-blown, meltdown fit.

Do you want to know the truth? I am that child.... regularly! I scream at God "But I WANT IT!" Whether its some shiny new thing, a raise, a relationship, whatever it is, "I WANT IT!" God however, as a good parent, sees the dangers that I do not perceive, and lovingly tells me "No." And I respond with all the maturity, poise, and grace of a 2 year old, crumpling into an emotional heap, kicking and screaming, and believing that God doesn't love me. When someone tries to remind me that "God works all things together for the good of those who love Him" I mentally add "except for me" to the end.

And yet, some of the things I have wanted the most in my life, in hindsight, would have been disastrous. But that disaster and heartache was avoided, because God protected me by telling me "No." Although I usually don't like His methods, and sometimes don't want to hear it, God IS working all things together for my greatest good.

I think the Garth Brooks song said it best: Some of God's greatest gifts, are Unanswered Prayers.

Question: What has God told you "No" to, which you're now thankful for?

An Unexpected Answer

The top of the mountain was shrouded in clouds, yet still we pressed on. The morning had dawned cold and clear. We'd started hiking just as the first grey streaks of dawn began chasing the stars from the sky. A breakfast of hot coffee and cold trail food now fueled our ascent. Watching the sun rising through the trees into a sapphire sky, the day had seemed full of promise.

But now the peak was invisible, hidden behind a dark, wispy, grey veil. We were above the treeline; nothing green grew here. The whistling wind was bitterly cold, turning every bead of sweat into an icy-cold drop. We were climbing on a scree of broken, grey shale, into a sky of swirling grey clouds. Each slippery, unstable step as much a matter of the will, as of the body.

Pausing for a moment, desperately trying to catch my breath, I half thought, half prayed "God, this is hard!"

"Isn't that the point?"

The answer was completely unexpected, disruptive, and ...perfect.

I was going through one of the darkest, most difficult times of my life. Part of why I had decided to climb this mountain was to simply escape from all of that for a while. And standing there, halfway between earth and sky, God lovingly spoke to me, and gave me the key to persevere through both of those storms: The very fact that it is difficult, makes it worthwhile; If it were easy, it wouldn't be an accomplishment. If it didn't require anything of me, I wouldn't value it. If it didn't challenge me, I would never grow. If it didn't take me to the utter end of my own ability, I would never reach out to God for the strength to carry on.

In the very place I had ran to escape from my problems, God met me with the answer. Far above the treeline, He brought growth. While standing on a mountain, God gave me the key to survive the valley.
The day was full of promise after all.

"I will never leave you, nor forsake you"  - Hebrews 13:5

Question: Where has God met you unexpectedly? What difficulties has he brought you through?

The Content Monster

Silence is not golden. I hate silence.

I used to hate silence because it made me feel uncomfortable. I didn't like my thoughts when left alone with them, and they didn't like me either. I couldn't handle the introspection that inevitably accompanied silence, so I had to keep some kind of noise going to keep my mind occupied. (Pro-Tip, if this describes you, then it is definitely time for a look "under the hood," in spite how uncomfortable it may be.)

Now I hate silence because if feels like wasted time. I like to feed my mind things that I feel will help me grow as a person. I love podcasts. And blogs. And Twitter. I follow some amazing people, and I love the perspectives they bring, and the questions they ask. I love books too, but I don't feel I have time enough to read a long blog post, let alone an entire book. I literally have 42 books on my "To Read" list, and a few more that I own but haven't gotten around to reading.

In my quest for content, I'm always in a rush. I skim the blogs I follow, looking for nuggets of wisdom I can glean. I do the same with my twitter feed. I skip over the intro on podcasts. I want to get to the "good stuff" as fast as I can, so I can absorb it, and then move on to the next source. I've found so many terrific sources of "good stuff" that I have a hard time keeping up. And maybe it's a bit OCD of me, but I often feel obligated to keep up; that if I don't, I might miss some vital insight.

This pattern has resulted in a nearly constant stream of input going into my brain, with little or no time to analyze or mull over the concepts I am hearing. Its as if I'm drinking from a firehose, and have no time to swallow. I've not been allowing my brain any down time.

I realized however, that this is not only unwise, but it is fundamentally faithless. While there is nothing wrong with pursuing wisdom and understanding (in fact the Bible commends those pursuits), I don't need to be worried about rushing to consume all the wisdom and insight I can get my hands on, so I don't miss any "vital insight." If something is "vital" then I can count on God (who promises He will supply all of my needs) to make sure I have it when I need it. Yet, while I know His timing is always perfect, I still struggle with this.

Additionally, if there is no break in the "input", no mental down time, no .... silence.... then I am leaving no space in which to think about what I'm hearing, and make sure it is truth.

Lastly, with no silence, I'm leaving no room for God to speak; no opportunity for me to hear the Lord's "still, small voice" leading me, guiding me.

I love my phone because it brings all of this content, all of this information to me in one convenient portable little package. But I'm learning that, periodically, I need to simply turn off this little Content Monster, and be still before the Lord. I need to give Him a chance to speak, and then do the hardest thing of all... listen. 

I may hate doing it, and it takes time, but soon His voice does come, amid the sounds of silence.

Question:
Do you keep yourself constantly busy? What keeps you from setting aside time to think, and "be still" before the Lord?